Tool of the Year 2009

Earlier this year, Military HQ hosted an ‘Unaustralian of the Year.’ Not to be outdone, I instead hosted ‘Tool of the Year 2008’, for that special someone who wasn’t simply Unaustralian, but a hypocrite and asshole to boot. The winner was Fred ‘Boobies are Satan’s pillows’ Nile, who had the gal to ruthlessly demonise the Muslim-Australian community, and then turn around and claim to be representing Muslim interests. Like I said, a hypocrite and an asshole.

As 2009 comes to an end, I need to pick another TOTY. There were a number of contenders (Rudd, Minchin, Nile again, Tuckey, ) but only one person could fulfill that vomit-inducing combination of tooliness.

Namely, Fred Nile, again. And for very similar reasons he won last year. It may seem unfair that Nile win again, given that Kevin “Should I commit to human rights for refugees, or try and peel some votes off the ‘Howard racists’ voting bloc? Too late-found the dog whistle!” Rudd certainly came close. However, Nile wins again simply for outdoing himself this year.

Recently, a CDP operative was revealed to have made a string of abusive and derogatory remarks about Muslims in a few email exchanges. If they were about Jews, he wouldn’t have been so much criticized as booted out of the country. The CDP went into damage control, with Nile himself saying the party “disassociates itself completely" from the comments, ''which we totally reject. No one deserves to be subjected to such language and insult.'' However, one should look at some of Freddy’s ideas about domestic policies and Muslims: ban them from the military, and deport them.

So the TOTY medal must to go Fred ‘dy Kruger’ Nile, for critisising a CDP member for remarks that are, although cruder, still no less ostracizing than his own writings. Maybe Nile should apply the Wallace test to himself, and then actually asking “WWJD” before revelling in his hatred of the Other.

However, Nile also receives the runner-up prize for TOTY, for his views on women. Fred says he is "concerned about the sexual exploitation of women in our society." This 'concern' of course, is more about women having reproductive and sexual freedom than anything else. Nile states that the Greens "sexually objectify" women through their civil libertarian policies on sex, that that this is damaging to women. However, Nile has shown exactly what he thinks of women, regarding women serving in the military:

"Combat roles will also expose female soldiers to gunshot injuries, which could prevent them from being able to bear children."

Women: nothing they do or contribute towards society is more important than being a baby factory. This alone could win Nile TOTY 2010.

Hattip to Orville Strayan.