Sunday, December 7, 2008

Queer poetry

In the fall-out of Prop8 being passed, soldiers on both sides of no-man's land have taken to writing limericks* to express themselves.

From the conservative trench:
Limericks on Prop 8

There once were some people called “gay”
Who were used to getting their way.
They lost on “queer marriage,”
Then set out to disparage
Churches, and make Mormons pay.
__________________________

“Down with Prop 8!”
Angry “gays” said it was all about “hate.”
Their hypocrisy uncanny,
They roughed up a granny
As for liberal court activism they wait.
From G.A.Y:
There's a group for whom rights are a quarrel
They're obsessed with both anal and oral
Out of boredom or hurt
They treat gays like dirt
And then smugly call themselves 'moral'
__________________________

Prop 8 stripped rights away
From folks, both les and gay
The vote was historic
'Were they cruel, mean, or sick?'
Is what some in the future might say
__________________________

My wedding was planned for C-A
But now it's not, because I'm gay
Must alter plans
Due to unrighteous bans
Hell yes, these 'values voters' will pay!
__________________________

Prop 8ers are crying 'victim'
You'd think someone had kicked 'em
But it's just more spin
From Team 'Gay is a Sin'
Is Deception a Godly dictum?

And finally, our favorite:

There once was a gay man from Nantucket
He can marry there and Peter LaBarbera can do absolutely nothing about it.
And in the comments-from fannie:

Many closets have married a she.
For social approval it's key.
What a fate for the girl.
The thought makes me hurl.
Just accept gay as a way to be.

Some say "you dare not be gay, son."
"Turn ex-gay, have life in the sun."
If you think that is true,
here's a question for you.
Would you have your daughter marry one?

If you’re sad you may be enticed
to turn ex-gay through Jesus Christ.
If you agree to pay,
they will help you pray.
But you’ll still be gay after the heist.

Americans for Truth is lies
on gays to please Christian allies.
They bash twenty four seven.
It's a ticket to heaven.
Who cares if a gay hurts or dies?

'cans for Truth is anti-gay shtick
with Peter as its leading prick.
Ev'ry hour ev'ry day
he thinks all things gay.
he must secretly lust for a dick.

Peter is really a troll
with his head in the dark like a mole.
With prideful ignorance,
combined with arrogance.
It’s why he’s viewed as an asshole.
And from LOrion:
There's a sad little bigot named Petey
Whose energy could help the needy
Instead he delights
In opposing gay rights
Even God wonders why he's so seedy.

Your limerick is perfectly formed
And shows Petey as truly deformed
You are able to write
His spiritual plight
Proves you're crafty as well as informed

Fuc. King. Brilliant.

*because I'm very A-type when it comes to the traditional structure of poetry, I've made mild alterations to the poems to make them more limerick-y. Yes, even progressives can have a hardline conservative streak.

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